6 going on 26...

my youngest (for now) little guy turned 6 today. physically, he is 6. mentally, you would swear he was 26. the things he says and does are simply priceless.

one of noahs favorite things to do is dress up. sometimes for play, sometimes just to go out. i have a very small vote in what he leaves the house in. opinionated doesn't even begin to cover it!

so while at barnes and noble one night he saw, and immediately fell in love with a spy kit. included are these super cool spy glasses with mirrors on the inside. also included is a mustache. i foresee a 'stache' trend developing here.



of course when it comes to "noah, look this way so i can get a picture", he is all over it. no pose-promting required.


and he had to pose with his posse.
(yes, he is wearing his jammies....it's an after-church-sunday-traditon in our house. plus it is his birthday. who am i to argue what he wants to wear to his party??)



i love you dude! you are such a wonderful part of our family and i am so thankful i get to be your mom!! just remember who to give props to when your famous.

the unknown

we all fear the unknown. to some extent or another.
right now the thing that is completely occupying my mind/life is my pregnancy.
i went in this week for an ultrasound because i was measuring big.
the ultrasound proves that i am 36 weeks and 4 days pregnant.

the ultrasound also showed that my baby is in the breech position. ugh.
this i have feared for many reasons, but mostly because i really don't want to have a c-section.
i've always had normal vaginal births. for the most part they have been pleasant, albeit a little quick...but that's good too, isn't it?
now i have a few things to consider.

option 1: they can try to turn him, externally. painful? yes. a bit risky? yes. a hospital procedure? yes. epidural involved? yes.

option 2: i opt for a c-section. unknown to me? yes. scary? yes. horrendous recovery time? yes.

option 3: i deliver him breech. now i'm not entirely clear as to whether this option will still be on the table in 2 more weeks because of the breech presentation. in some cases or positions, they will not let you deliver breech vaginally. it's too risky to mom and baby. mostly baby.


so i've got some things to consider, ponder and pray about. it's all a bit scary to me. mostly because of the unknown. it's not familiar. of course the most important thing is the health and safety of the baby, so my decision will be based on that.

but still.....it's fear of the unknown that's kind of consuming me.

he wants to come for christmas...

throughout this pregnancy i have had a strong feeling that i will NOT make it to my january 24 due date. not by a long shot. i have no particular reason for feeling this way, it's just a feeling.
on tuesday i had a doctors appt. and i measured 2 centimeters ahead of what i should be. the previous appt. i measured 1 centimeter ahead. so, that puts me now at 36 weeks instead of 32. hmm. not a big surprise to me given the feelings i have been having.
tuesday evening i started having regular contractions. like 8 minutes apart contractions. i called the doctor and he told me to go in.
after being hooked up to monitors, an i.v. (which hurt more than any i.v. has a right to because apparently i have "rolly" viens), and poked and proded in many other uncomfortable (understatement) ways, they decided to stop my contractions. with two very painful (like killer beesting painful) shots of something i can't remember or even pronounce. i sent stephan out to get something to eat while the medicine did it's thing. the nurse left me a remote that had a call button and tv controls. a remote that wasn't plugged in. nice. i soon wished i wasn't alone because my pulse was racing. i truly felt like i was going to burst, or have a heartattack, or some other dramatic act. my face felt hot, as did the rest of me. help! when stephan returned he commented on how red i was and i told him how the rest of me felt. we called the nurse and she said, oh, that's a side effect of the medications....sorry i forgot to tell you. umm...yeah...that little piece of information would have been useful for my peace of mind.
after an hour or so more of waiting and feeling like i was coming out of my skin, she came back in and said that i could go home. great. good. just get me out of here, please! while she was taking my i.v. out (almost as painful as when it went in) stephan was texting my sister. laughing all the while because their conversation was apparently hilarious. i'm gritting my teeth and bleeding all over the place. okay, maybe it was only a few drops of blood, but at that moment it might as well have been gushing. and my husband is laughing/texting. sheesh. now i know that he loves me and cares about me. i know this. i'm just saying...
so i get dressed, sign all the documents, get instructions, yeah, yeah, yeah...just let me out of here already. mama needs to EAT! get in the car and screech into the drive-thru of mcdonalds - STAT! i downed that cheeseburger faster than i care to relate. and the large frys. ahem. well, i was pretty much licking that bag for more. all self respect out the window long ago.

we'll see how much longer this little guy will stay in my belly. he really wants out!

california adventure

my mom gave me a glorious opportunity to go out to california and help celebrate her birthday with her.
just me. no kids.
believe it or not, i almost didn't go because i was a bit nervous about the travel being so far along in my pregnancy.
but then i thought, take this opportunity and RUN! this may be the last "me" trip in a very long time.
so off i went!




i divided my time between staying with my mom in san jose, and staying with my sister in san francisco. she lives two blocks from fishermans wharf, and two blocks from north beach. perfectly dreamy situation as far as i'm concerned!!

due to my large belly, i wasn't able to walk/sightsee as much as i would have wanted, but i did manage to visit a few of my favorite "haunts".
boudin bakery. sigh. i am a sourdough bread girl through and through. and bread has been a serious craving throughout this pregnancy (am i right or am i right, stephan??). i enjoyed every last bite of the delicious clam chowder served up in a lovely sourdough bread bowl. yum.

trader joes. okay, yes it may just be a grocery store to some, but when you have to live without one (here in colorado) and you get the opportunity to shop at one...you take it, as much as possible!!!
i wonder if they would ship those yummy green juice drinks to me? i miss them so....




now for the party.
it was sooo beautiful! my mom has an amazing group of women in her life, and sitting there talking, celebrating, just being together was definitely a highlight of my trip.
nichole and i decorated. my moms girlfriend catered the affair with the most delicious faire. i wish i had gotten more pictures of the food and the company.
it was absolutely delightful in every way!

(man, i'm huge!!!! doesn't help that i'm standing next to my skinny-mini mom and sister)

yes, i had to do the token 'heart on the belly' pregnancy shot. it's done by virtually every pregnant women in the free world, but it's a shot i've been waiting to do (and i think earned) for a while.


isn't this cake heaven??? and the taste...ahhh the taste....i have dreams about this delicious cake. it was amAZing!

thank you mom and nichole for a beautiful trip. i love you so much, and am so totally thankful that you made it possible for me to be with you this past weekend!

snow days bring out the june cleaver in me

we got dumped on yesterday...oh and it's still comin' down. tons of fluffy, perfect snow. the amount that keeps everyone on lock-down, shuts down business', schools, and any other activities. (except steph had to go to work - booo)
i, of course, love days like this!!! so cozy. so perfect. the kind of day that completely inspires me to CREATE!!


and the kind of day that inspires kids and dogs to play...






now to the june cleaver part of the day:

baking...



and crafting! i have very basic crochet skills. like scarf and blanket making skills only. but i've always wanted to learn how to make cutsie hats. so i googled "how to" and learned how to make this little beauty from youtube.

you like?


i'm kinda partial to the lovely pink flower that adorns it.
can't wait to wear this!
happy continued snow day to all my fellow snow-bound friends.
and if you are elsewhere, many happy, snowy thoughts to you!!

our first annual halloween party...

i love halloween. i think i've mentioned that before. love it. truly.
so, it would only make sense to celebrate it to full capacity with good friends, right?!
yes!
so we decided to have a halloween party. a costume party.
let me just say...it was a blast! the planning, the doing, the celebrating...tons of fun! my only regret is that i did not take more pictures (especially of the decorated house :( live and learn)
but i did get this gruesome scene that stephan set up in our yard. (i hope it didn't frighten the little ones too much!)



oh, and next year i really want my older boys to be there (they were at their dads).

so here we are in costume. truth be told, i was giddy about my costume. until i made it, and then realized it was a bit unclear about what i was. i was going for pea pod with pea. but the top part of the pod wouldn't stay put, so i think it looked more like peter pan meets mid summers nights dream-ish scenerio. oh well. it worked.
stephan was supposed to be the farmer. get it. i thought it was clever, and maybe others might have too if he looked a bit more farmer-esque, and less modern cowboy. oh well. it kind of worked too.
noah was originally a storm trooper. and he does have the costume. but about half way through the party his primary teachers came (he is so enamoured with them!) and he changed outfits approximately five times. umm...he was a cowboy, then a sort of indiana jones, then back to storm trooper, then some mystery getup, then p.j.'s. which is what he ended the night in, hence what he's wearing in our picture.


and here are some of our guests (i regret there were a few families i didn't get pictures of - dang!)
i think my favorite part was seeing the great things grown-ups came up with.
somehow when we have kids we lose that part of us that goes to costume parties. why is this? well, no more for this family. we will have a halloween party EVERY year. and costumes will be a must!!
thanks to all our friends that came and had fun with us. you are all good sports!!

halloween quilt

i am feeling quite festive with this halloween season (it is my favorite holiday). so i thought our couch needed a festive quilt.
hmm...maybe i will make one for all the holidays....

art trading cards

i started making atc's a couple of months ago, and i have to say, you get hooked! i did a swap when i was with scrap 'n art. sadly, i sent mine out, but did not receive the promised cards in return :(. huge bummer.
so, i've just been making them for my own keeping. BUT, if any of you out there would be interested in doing a swap, let me know!!!
oh, if you don't know what atc's are, basically the only rule is the size: 2.5 in x 3.5 in. other than that, play away! you can do themes, quotes, paint, draw, collage, whatever is YOU!


so this was my first atc. (the one i sent for the swap. it was based on favorite quotes) if i make one for someone else, or a swap, i always do a "series" so that i have my own to keep.






summer time theme....



halloween theme (this one was so much FUN!)...



and this is going to be a series. taken from a general conference talk on the "ity" virtues. kind of my way of journaling about a really good talk!

let me know if you want to do some swappin'! :) trust me, you'll be hooked!

last week

my husband pointed out that i haven't updated my blog in awhile.

well....

when i blog, i do so for posterity purposes first and foremost. but i have felt a bit conflicted because of the rollercoaster week i've had.

last sunday in the wee hours of the morning i awoke with a horrible pain. worse than the standard cramp. i sat up in bed because i needed to get up and go to the bathroom. when i slipped out of bed i made it to my knees, felt dizzy and sick, then passed out. i awoke lying on my back with stephan over me calling my name. weirdest feeling ever. long story short, i was fine. went to the doctor, and he found nothing. the baby is healthy and kicking. but the week was peppered with boughts of sickness, dizzyness and extreme fatigue. weird.

that same sunday, in california, my mom took my sister to the ER. she spent almost an entire week there with what turned out to be acute kidney failure. i can honestly say i was really scared. i wanted to be with her more than anything. she is fine now, back at work, back in the swing of life.

but...

for a week i really wasn't sure.

now my sister and i are close, even if we don't talk that often and see each other only a few times a year. she is my baby sister and i love her more than i can express.

it's just strange to me that i had my "episode" right at the same time she was experiencing probably the worst pain of her life.

i really believe we are more connected than either one of us knows.

after a week of many sincere prayers and lots of faith, all is well again.

it is experiences like these that make me realize how blessed i am. how much i have to be thankful for. how much i love my family...all of them.
times may still be tight and a bit scary (financially), but i am rich beyond measure.

we're having....

a boy!
surprised?
i know i was.
all is healthy and looking great.
i am happy....
and at a total loss for a boy name.
any suggestions?

i *heart* family visitors!

this weekend my mom and sister came to see us. awesome!! i have been looking forward to this for awhile. i dearly love hanging out with them.



big sister, little sister. this pic is both of our hands with our sundance pearl rings (yesterday i took them to the glorious sundance store!!) (oh, and no, i'm not missing my pinkie finger - in case you were wondering)


and little sister torturing big sister....





and my sister took a few pics of steph and i...this one is my favorite because it's just totally, 100% US! one of us is usually laughing...and we are totally into each other. :)

summer 2006

more...

more jewelry. i am kind of in a groove right now. for no particular reason. just cause.



i bought this gorgeous antique pendant on ebay like five years ago. now it sits on a black ribbon, with an attached clasp, so it can adorn my neck. (if you click on the pic you may be able to see the detail in the black onyx cameo)





my friend natalie gave me this lovely, carved bead. now it has a happy home!

one of my fun, lose-myself, play, be silly, be totally free, happy places

i know i've posted about journaling before. but it is something i do so randomly that i am really posting this for me to motivate myself to do it MORE!
when i journal/paste/write/draw/color, i am five again. it really jump starts my creativity to do other things. it is one of my favorite things to do, as is going through some of the pages over and over again. it's a compilation of my favorite things, and happy thoughts....who wouldn't want to revisit that??
so having said all of that, please don't judge me. i am giving you a peek inside, and realize that the writing/drawing/etc. may not be perfect or up to certain standards. it shouldn't be. that's the point. i may use words in "improper" ways. that is me...at least when i journal. no rules. no lines to stay in. just freedom to do as i please.









this is an activity i want to do again. i collected random things throughout the week. things i saw on the ground, stuff i got at restaurants, etc. i tried to write a bit on each item to remind me where i found it, what it is.

and here are some of the contents of that envelope...


these are what some of my typical journal pages look like. depending on how much time i take.